sad realizations

hmmm as i grow older, i make more enemies or let's say i make less friends. am i making sense? *sigh* i don't know if it's because i know i have my real friends already and that's why i don't make any effort to make new friends or take care of them. i've changed a lot since high school. in high school i wanted to please everyone and just take everything, even if some people abused my "kindness". i realized that i have to love myself and express my opinion. have i gone to the extreme end of that trait and have become a bitch? i feel like i don't fit in anywhere. was i better off trying to please everyone? hayyy... firstborn woes.